Post by Advantage on Nov 22, 2011 5:58:29 GMT -5
The UFSL's Top Names
A name does not indicate an individuals ability to perform at school, their job or even in bed. It simply is just a few or perhaps even a lot of letters built into one wonderful identity for a person to be known under. In leagues like these, however, a name can often mean much more. In cases like mine, I tend to name my players by my real name, which is Christopher Miller. Instant Rockstar does this a lot too, and on top of that, likes to have his players physical characteristics match his real life ones. There are others like Bash who tend to stick to a name not like their own. We have seen names like Ron Mexico and Brady Stropko grace these leagues on multiple occasions. Then there are the names that stick out to us due to their creativity and humor. These are the memorable names that really bring out an agent's personality, and those are the names we will be looking at in this article.
#5 - Al Capone
Truly, it does not fit the creative or humor aspects. So why is it listed? I just imaged Al Capone as a football player and felt there are so many possibilities with this name. Will he show up hammered out of his mind for every game? Will he pull a Gilbert Arenas in the locker room? Will we see the rest of his gangs at the Nightmare squads? I just felt rather then sticking to an average, basic name, Claymaker made the interesting choice of going with a dead smuggler and gang member that is pretty well world famous.
#4 - Little Planet
This one gets the award of being fairly odd. This is definitely creative because, well, who would name their player "Little Planet"? Apparently, the answer to that question is Fuze. Is he an alien? Is his fathers name "Big Planet"? In that case, what is his mothers name? It is intriguing yet confusing. Do the rest of his teammates live in this little planet? How small is it? Will Shotty's sequel be "Smallest Planet"? All these questions convinced me that there is enough creativity to receive a top five place in my heart.
#3 - Dave Hester
Yuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuup! Dave Hester cracks the top-five, mainly due to the fact that I love Storage Wars and he makes me laugh every episode. The loud, chubby, hat-wearing storage buyer turns to football, and perhaps a career in catching balls rather than selling them. Has he gotten into better shape? Is his touchdown celebration going to involve a microphone and a certain catchphrase? Will his post-game interviews be as entertaining and rewarding as his Storage Wars ones? Will Darrell join the league and become his main rival? I assume swaganomics101 is a fan of the show, hence the player name, so perhaps we will see Dave Jr. in the future too!
#2 - Prince Sackington
This truly is a testament to how poor some of the names are in this league. The last pick of the draft, and everyone's favorite sim league participant, Matthew McIntyre, takes the second place ranking with Prince Sackington. Frankly, I preffered it when the last name was just a blank line. Prince? So Matt is already conceding that there are people more important than him. Perhaps he is more focused on the VNFL, a league in which he apparently may administrate for. Why Sackington by the way? Middle linebackers are known for their tackles, not their sacks. Prince Tackleton would have made a lot more sense in my eyes. Leave it to McIntyre to both screw up his name, and yet still make this list. Too bad this was not a vote on the leagues most useless player, or he would actually be first in that ranking. Oops, I am an admin, I should not be saying these things.
#1 - Maple Syrup/French Toast
Leave it to these two goofballs to take home the best names in the league. Maple Syrup (Duckberg) and French Toast (eatwittommy) took this poll by a wide margin, and due to their relativity to each other, I could not help but pair them together at the top. Consistently, these two seem to have awesome names in leagues. A recent example is when Duckberg named his player, Pokemon Master, in VNFL. Only he would cross paths with Pokemon, when trying to think of a player name for a football league. Either way, these two guys are important to their team, and also have the best names the UFSL has to offer.
